Chapter 6 - The Letters He Never Wanted Me to ReadOn January 7, the doctors moved me out of intensive care.
It should have been a day worth celebrating.
My infection was improving.
My blood pressure had stabilized.
I could sit upright without feeling as though the entire room were spinning.
Rachel bought me a small cupcake from the hospital café.
Hannah drew a ridiculous smiley face on the wrapper.
Even Angela stopped by to tell me how proud she was of my progress.
But that afternoon, a package arrived.
There was no return address.
Only my name.
Miriam Bennett.
Rachel opened it for me after checking that I wanted to see what was inside.
The package contained a thick envelope and a flash drive.
On top was a handwritten note.
Your husband has been lying to both of us. I think you deserve to know why.
It was signed with two initials.
S.R.
I didn't recognize them.
Rachel looked at me.
"Do you know anyone with those initials?"
I shook my head.
We called Olivia before opening the envelope further.
She arrived an hour later.
Inside were printed emails, financial records, and photographs.
The first email was dated September 18.
It was from Conrad to a woman named Serena Rhodes.
The separation needs to happen after the new year. I can't have Miriam asking questions before the accounts are reorganized.
I stopped breathing for a moment.
Olivia continued reading.
The next message said:
Vanessa is becoming impatient, but once the property arrangements are finalized, Miriam won't have much leverage.
Rachel whispered, "Unbelievable."
Then I noticed something at the bottom of the page.
An email address.
Serena Rhodes.
The name sounded familiar.
I searched my memory.
Then it came to me.
"She's the woman from Conrad's office."
Rachel looked up.
"Who?"
"She handled payroll. She started last spring."
I'd met Serena at a company picnic.
She was in her early thirties, quiet, with dark curly hair and a little boy who loved dinosaurs.
Conrad said she was excellent at her job.
I remembered giving her son a toy airplane.
Why would Serena send me this?
Olivia examined the documents.
"We'll need to verify authenticity and determine how these materials were obtained before relying on them. But they give us a lead."
She contacted Serena using the number listed on the note.
Serena answered immediately.
"I was hoping you'd call."
Serena agreed to speak to Olivia privately first.
She explained that she'd discovered unusual accounting entries while reconciling business expenses.
When she questioned them, Conrad ordered her to stop.
Then she found emails showing that he had been planning to move significant assets before telling me about the affair.
"I didn't know Miriam was sick," Serena said over the phone.
"I understand," Olivia replied.
"No, you don't. When I saw the photograph of Conrad and Vanessa on New Year's Day, I thought about how often Miriam used to bring homemade food for everyone at the office."
I closed my eyes.
Every birthday.
Every holiday.
Every time someone had a new baby.
I baked cookies, organized celebrations, and remembered names.
I thought those people were part of our extended family.
Serena's voice broke.
"Then he fired me last week."
Olivia straightened.
"For what stated reason?"
"Performance concerns. But he told me privately that asking too many questions had consequences."
Rachel shook her head.
Serena continued.
"I kept copies of some correspondence because I was worried I would be blamed for transactions I didn't authorize. I sent what I believed might help Miriam, but I'm willing to discuss everything formally."
Olivia explained that the documents would need careful legal review.
Before ending the call, I asked to speak.
"Serena?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
She began crying.
"I should have said something sooner."
"You said something now."
And for the first time, I realized that Conrad's confidence had depended on other people staying silent.
One by one, they were beginning to speak.
That evening, Dr. Shah sat down with me to discuss treatment.
My pneumonia had improved enough that the leukemia team was preparing to begin induction therapy.
They explained the recommended medications, the expected hospitalization, monitoring requirements, and the possibility of complications.
Rachel asked detailed questions.
Hannah helped me understand the medical terminology.
I signed the necessary consent forms after reviewing the plan.
When the doctor left, I stared at the papers.
Rachel noticed.
"Second thoughts?"
"No."
"Then what?"
I looked at her.
"What if I lose my hair?"
She smiled gently.
"Then I'll buy you the most outrageous hats in the state of New York."
I laughed.
"What if I get really sick?"
"Then we'll help you through whatever happens."
"What if it doesn't work?"
Rachel's expression became serious.
"Then we deal with that information when we have it. But we don't surrender before treatment begins."
I nodded.
Then I whispered the truth.
"I'm scared I'll die without ever knowing what it feels like to be loved properly."
Rachel's eyes filled with tears.
She climbed carefully onto the edge of my bed and hugged me.
"Miriam, look around."
I thought about her children drawing pictures for my hospital wall.
Hannah driving from Boston.
Eleanor bringing cookies.
Serena risking her career to tell the truth.
The nurses who remembered how I liked my tea.
I started crying.
Because I understood what Rachel meant.
I'd been loved all along.
I had simply mistaken Conrad's approval for the only love that counted.
Across town, Conrad was growing increasingly restless.
Vanessa had moved into our house permanently.
At first, she'd been delighted.
She wore my clothes.
Used my skincare products.
Rearranged the living room.
Ordered new furniture.
But Conrad was no longer in a good mood.
He spent hours on the phone with accountants.
He snapped at employees.
He demanded to know why Martin had requested supporting documents for company expenditures.
That evening, Vanessa found him standing in his office.
"What is wrong with you?"
"Nothing."
"You're acting insane."
Conrad turned.
"Miriam hired an attorney."
Vanessa stared.
"So?"
"So she's asking about the accounts."
Vanessa's face changed.
"Does she know about the apartment?"
"Obviously."
"What about the other arrangement?"
Conrad glared at her.
"Lower your voice."
"What other arrangement?" Vanessa repeated nervously.
Conrad walked toward the window.
"There's no reason for her to find out."
Vanessa folded her arms.
"You promised me this would be handled before February."
"It will."
"You said she was weak."
"She is."
"Then why is she causing so much trouble?"
Conrad slammed his hand onto the desk.
"Because somebody is helping her!"
Vanessa stepped back.
For the first time, she looked afraid of him.
At 9:12 p.m., Eleanor called Conrad.
He answered after the third ring.
"What do you want?"
"Good evening to you too, Conrad."
"I'm busy."
"I've been wondering about Miriam."
He sighed.
"She's staying with her sister."
"Is she?"
"Yes."
"Then why have people been carrying her belongings out of your house?"
Conrad stiffened.
"We're reorganizing."
"Without her?"
"That's none of your business."
Eleanor was silent for a moment.
Then she said, "You know, Conrad, I've lived long enough to recognize a man who's making a terrible mistake."
He laughed.
"I don't need a lecture."
"No. You need a conscience."
He ended the call.
Eleanor stared at her phone.
Then she looked at the folded photograph of Miriam sitting on her kitchen table.
It had been taken at last summer's neighborhood barbecue.
Miriam was laughing with a paper plate in her hand.
Eleanor remembered how Conrad had criticized her dress that afternoon.
How the laughter disappeared from her face.
And she made a decision.
If Conrad intended to spread lies about Miriam, he would have to do it without the neighborhood's cooperation.
That night, Olivia received another call from Serena.
This time, Serena sounded frightened.
"I found something else."
"What?"
"A folder in the financial records."
"What's the folder called?"
There was a pause.
Then Serena answered.
"Contingency."
Olivia opened her notebook.
"What was inside?"
"Documents relating to a life insurance policy."
I felt the room grow cold.
Serena continued.
"The insured person was Miriam."
Rachel gripped my hand.
"And the beneficiary?" Olivia asked.
"Conrad."
I stared at the ceiling.
Life insurance itself wasn't unusual.
Conrad and I had purchased policies years earlier.
But Serena's next words made every hair on my arms stand upright.
"According to the documents I saw, Conrad requested a significant increase in coverage shortly before Miriam left for London."
I closed my eyes.
Conrad knew I had been unusually ill for months.
He knew I was exhausted.
He knew I was struggling.
And instead of insisting I see a doctor, he had apparently been investigating a larger insurance policy on my life.
I knew that didn't prove he intended to hurt me.
But after everything he'd done, it felt like another piece of a nightmare.
Olivia leaned toward the phone.
"Serena, don't make copies of anything else until we discuss the appropriate legal process. We need to establish exactly what the records show."
Then she turned to me.
"Miriam, we're going to investigate this carefully."
I nodded.
But deep inside, one thought wouldn't leave me.
The night Conrad abandoned me at the ferry terminal, he had looked directly into my feverish face.
He knew I could barely stand.
May you like
And he'd driven away anyway.
What if he'd been hoping I would never make it home?
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